His Fault, Her Fault, My Fault, Whose Fault? Who Cares?

As I sit here writing I am battling a great war from within. No, it is not a spiritual war. It is more like a stomach virus. My daughter was kind enough to share it with me.

Speaking of viruses. They seem to be running rampant through my house; not all the same strain of virus though. One of our computers has caught one. My daughter, who has a form of Autism, was watching a movie on that computer the other day and the computer virus decided to take over. It shut her movie down and she was not happy. In her innocence and ignorance of computer viruses, she looked up at me and asked, "Did I give the computer my virus?" I assured her she did not.

She later went on to ask if the storm brewing outside was caused by her virus. I am not sure why she felt she was to blame for all that went awry that day but I again assured her she was not at fault.

I have other children who would rather blame everyone else and their dog for things that go awry, especially if they know it is their fault. The comments are something like "It's his fault for running into my fist" or "I yelled at her because she wouldn't clean up my mess." Oh the insanity of parenthood sometimes!

Sadly it is not just children who act like this. I recently had the unfortunate opportunity to sit in a conference room with 5 people who had blamed each other for all that had gone wrong. They did this for so long that they had forgotten who was really to blame and since they didn't want to own up to their own mistakes they decided to blame me. To that I say "Hmmm....I wasn't even there!" Oh the insanity of adulthood!

Blaming others for our own mistakes is wrong. There is no gain in that. The truth always comes out.

What about those who are on the other side and they are the innocent ones being blamed? Although the truth does eventually become known, it may take a while and in the meantime they have to battle for their own integrity.

Job is no stranger to this side of the battlefield. He had three wonderful friends who, once they heard of his plight, sat out to sympathize and comfort him (Job 1:11). Granted, Job's friends were not to blame for his misfortune but the actions of these gentlemen were not going to be that of a godly nature; definitely not of sympathy or comfort.

Job had been tested by satan. Satan wanted to prove to God that Job wasn't as blameless and pure as God had seen him. So Job's livestock and family were taken from him. Then he was inflicted with painful sores on his body. Would all this cause him to curse God?

Then Eliphaz, Bildad, and Zophar came to the rescue. Their initial intent was to comfort Job. But the circumstances caught their eye and since they couldn't explain the reason for Job's plight, they decided that it must be Job's fault. He must have sinned to cause all this.

They spent hours pouring over Job as to why he was in distress and what he needed to do about it. When Job began his struggles with asking "Why?" Eliphaz attacked him using Job's ministry as a weapon. He told Job that when people came to him feeble or who had stumbled, he strengthened them and encouraged them. And now that Job is inflicted, why did he not take the same advice? (Job 4:5-6)

Bildad pointed out that God does not pervert justice. He said that God only punishes the wicked (Job 8). Therefore Job must have been wicked. Bildad told Job that if he was truly pure and upright then God would rouse himself on Job's behalf.

Zophar was even worse. He called Job a mocker. For truly Job was a sinner and for him to claim otherwise was mockery. Zophar told Job he needed to repent and allow no evil to dwell in his house anymore. Then God would save him. (Job 11).

To all this Job said, "I have heard many things like these; miserable comforters are you all! Will your long-winded speeches never end? What ails you that you keep on arguing?"(Job 16:2-3)

Of course it took a while longer for Job's "friends" to shut up. None of their accusations were valid; none were comforting. They only looked at the situation from their perspective. Much of this could have been eliminated if they had prayed for wisdom first. Instead they allowed their tongues to have reign over the situation.

The tongue is a mighty force. It has the power of life and death(Proverbs 18:21). We can bless with it or we can curse with it.

Proverbs 11:12 says A man who lacks judgment derides his neighbor, but a man of understanding holds his tongue.

Proverbs 15:4 says The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.

I encourage you to make an important New Year's Resolution this coming year. Resolve to use your tongue for healing not crushing, for blessing not cursing, for life not death. God Bless~